Someone wanted a list of things I'm bad at. :)
So here you go.
1. Returning books to the library on time. Let's just say that I just paid off all the family library cards and it was more than $100 and less than $300. Ouch. Thank goodness for our recent tax return. (I'm helping the library. I'm helping the library. I'm helping the library. I'm helping the library. I'm helping the library)
2. Patience. Really. I am not that patient some days. Too little sleep equals crabby mommy. I wish I could just fake it and just be happy. But I have never ever been good at that. People usually can tell how I feel quite easily. Also something I wish I could change.
3. Keeping up with the laundry. I really just need to learn to do at least one load a day. Not just wash it - but actually wash it and dry it and fold it and put it away. While I should be doing laundry, I am crafting something instead.
4. Playing with my kids. I am really not one of those mom's who will lay on the floor and play cars. Or pretend play house. That's not me. I actually used to be racked with guilt on the whole thing - but I've talked to my mom a LOT about it. And she was never like that either. She always says that's why she had multiple kids. To play with each other. :)
5. Guilt. I have a good friend who once told me she didn't understand motherhood guilt. I am racked with it. Should I be doing that, should I have done that, and on and on. It is a terrible thing that I have tried to change. Just let it be. I am constantly reading parenting books and talking to my mom about it.
6. Often I feel like fitting in. When I was a kid I didn't fit in. I got teased. And I still remember coming home from school crying. I am constantly worried about what other people think of me. It's a terrible way to live. But it is how I live. Worried about how to fit in better with my SILs, with the women in my ward, etc. I have been placed in many situations where I am the one saying I don't want my kids to do that. Or that isn't okay and I've never wanted to stand out. I just want to be me and be okay with that and not worry about what others think of it.
I've got lots more but I like to keep the ol' blog a bit more positive. :)
Besides, who likes to see others' dirty laundry? Not me!
And speaking of cleaning supplies.....
here's a picture from my photo class for last weeks assignment. (something that was translucent.)
15 comments:
Wow, that was comforting! I think so many of us deal with the same things and assume that no one else is as well. Oh the guilt....i can totally relate to that, and i love that i'm not the only one that's not always playing with my little ones. I've had SO much guilt with that one for years. Thanks for a great post!
I didn't find this post to be a downer at all. I always love getting to know you better, and I can relate to all of your list-except the library part haha. Because I am at the YMCA so often, I just do my library stops at the same time. Hopefully you'll do better when the new West Side location is finished.
I think it's funny that you worry about fitting in with the sisters in our ward. Everyone LOVES you and is jealous of your talents. You're a great friend and a lot of fun to be around. I'm sure there are ladies that want to "fit in" with YOU!
Rhonda, I love this post , everything you said is how I feel 100% your not the only one... but I must tell you , how when I first met you I was so jelous of you as a mother, Bradshaw had only been in school for a term and I thought how the heck does rhonda do such a good job with her husband in med school..... and I had no idea how crafty and creative you were then either .. now you just blow me away!!
Hey, I'm the 'someone!' This post was for me!
So I read your list, and the thought that came into my mind, was that scripture about how one gift is given to one, and one to another. It was so comforting, because several things on your list are things that I'm good at, (most of the time). And Heaven knows that you have talents that I don't (Hello!) So really, that is how we build each other up. We don't all have to be good at the same things!
It's an Ah-ha moment, as Oprah would say.
Oh, and I also have to take a little issue on the 'fitting in' one. Everyone knows who Rhonda is, everyone loves Rhonda, and everyone admires Rhonda. Trust me.
Awwww...don't beat yourself up. I could probably write everything you have on my own list, with a few little tweaks and changes. Especially the whole fitting in thing. I thought I was beyond it all and totally cool with myself. And then I hit 35 and had to do two moves within a year (the last one being very unexpected) and I feel like I'm back in highschool again trying to fit in. I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one with little struggles and challenges in my life! :-)
Yes, you are certainly not alone in any of those things. I can relate to all of them - especially the guilt and playing with the kids. I'd rather poke my eyes out than play with some of the toys my kids have - and now I'm going to try not to feel too guilty for admitting that...sigh
Your kids are lucky to have u as a mom!!!! Just 2 more months to westside branch of the library opens then u will not have to go all the way downtown to get and return books!!!
One of my favorite things about where we live - no late fees at the library! It's saving me all kinds of money!
Nice to know none of us is alone and we all have some of those same feelings love this post!! you really are awesome! I think its a great post! Now we know you are normal and "fit" in just fine with the rest of us!
I totally love your honesty in this post but I still think I disagree with the whole patience thing - you seem so patient to me.
love you and your honesty and i miss you a tonne!
I was on my library account recently and it said, "Status: Deliquent". What! My husband was heading over to the library and told them how upset I was that I was labeled a deliquent. It turns out I owed $1.00. If you owe any money, you are the status of "Deliquent". So whether you owe just under $300 or just over $1.00 like me, we at least have the same status according to the library. And if I am at the same status as Rhonda, then I think I 'm doing okay!
I think this was one of my favorite posts. ever.
It's nice knowing you're normal. (and that we all are!)
P.S. I still think you're awesome.
Oh Rhonda I just love you! I can relate to so much of what you say and do!
I think one gets more accepting and less guilty with age. Although not more patient.
Well I'm five out of six of those too. And one of them is because I don't have a library to not take books back to. Hear ya...totally hear ya.
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